Written by Steven Barnes
A Hollywood producer visits Baywatch and decides to create a television show based on lifeguarding, sending headquarters into a tizzy.
When Don Brand decides to take a break between pitch meetings and visit the beach, he is delighted to discover that the sand and sun are the perfect framework for a new network television series, which he dubs Rescue Bay. The rescues, the sun, the girls in bikinis–it’s a perfect combination of blue-skies escapism and real human drama. Brand is convinced that he has a number one show on his hands, and immediately sets about researching for the creation of the Rescue Bay pilot. He follows the Baywatch lifeguards, interviewing them about their lives, all the while thinking about which A-list TV star he will cast in their parts. Matt and Summer are played by network-deal ingenues and Brand holds an open casting call on the beach, staging a mock rescue and sending would-be starts into the water. CJ, unaware of the casting session, rushes into the audition and attempts to save the “victim.” Brand is smitten, and within moments, CJ is reading for the lead role, only to discover that she is competing with Stephanie Holden for the part. When the two roommates argue over who is more suited to play the role, Mitch agrees to read a love scene with both, unwittingly triggering a jealous love match between the two roommates.
To make matters worse, Mitch’s character is played by a Schwarznegger-like oaf, Dolph Apolganger. Garner is played by a conceited film actor, “Sly” Hutchison, who could be his identical twin, and the series pilot turns out to be a fifteen-minute series “presentation.” Finally, Brand gets his script together and filming is slated to begin. The opening action sequence features a boat explosion, and when the stunt backfires, CJ and her co-star Dolph are both knocked unconscious. From the beach, the real Baywatch lifeguards take lifesaving into their own hands, proving without a doubt that Brand’s version of Baywatch lifeguarding is a far cry from the real thing.
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